I fell yesterday.
The Husband and I were sitting down for a talk... a very important talk. Stuff needed to be said, heard, considered, understood. So, what happens? I go sit on bed corner - apparently, still not having adjusted to mattress we had to borrow - and tumble over, tried to break my fall with my right arm, rolled over and my way-too-heavy-for-my-size body slammed onto the carpeted floor. I'm okay I guess, just a little sore, with some swelling at my right hip and twinges at my shoulder, elbow and wrist.
So, I'll be taking things easy for a while.
Later.
Tuesday, August 4, 2015
Monday, August 3, 2015
Let Me Start By Saying...
... I'm no expert. No, really. There is nothing that I could honestly say that I'm an expert at. I'm okay with that; there are plenty of brilliant minds, accomplished, and creative people out there to fill that bill: Expert insert expertise here . Nope, not me. I'm more of a, "Let's see what I can come up with in a pinch."
One thing I will admit is that I am a tryer. (That's not a word, me.) Oh, an even better way of putting it... I'm a failure! A big one. For example: Once attempted to make a layered German chocolate cake from scratch for my husband's birthday; it ended up a tort... a cement tort.
One time, I tried to make delicious bbq ribs... Oh. My. God! I got nowhere near anything consumable, Instructions were, "First, boil ribs." What I didn't do was have a pot large enough to accommodate the segments of ribs I had plans of turning into bbq feast main event. Everything was super tight in the, what I thought was a more than adequate, pot. That pot was filled with water to the brim, ribs where tightly packed in it and lid placed to seal in all the goodness. Thing is, there was no such goodness to be had... the moment I lifted that lid, barbecue over before it began.
The smell in the house was horrible, the burnt-stuck-to-the-bottom-of-the-pot segment of ribs... they never had a chance. I had never seen or smelled anything like it. How does stuff burn while boiling!? I seemed to have nailed that. I was worried I'd never be able to get the stench out of the house. My kids were positive that would never be possible. Way to go with the encouragement, children o' mine.
See, I try. But boy can I fail.
One thing I will admit is that I am a tryer. (That's not a word, me.) Oh, an even better way of putting it... I'm a failure! A big one. For example: Once attempted to make a layered German chocolate cake from scratch for my husband's birthday; it ended up a tort... a cement tort.
One time, I tried to make delicious bbq ribs... Oh. My. God! I got nowhere near anything consumable, Instructions were, "First, boil ribs." What I didn't do was have a pot large enough to accommodate the segments of ribs I had plans of turning into bbq feast main event. Everything was super tight in the, what I thought was a more than adequate, pot. That pot was filled with water to the brim, ribs where tightly packed in it and lid placed to seal in all the goodness. Thing is, there was no such goodness to be had... the moment I lifted that lid, barbecue over before it began.
The smell in the house was horrible, the burnt-stuck-to-the-bottom-of-the-pot segment of ribs... they never had a chance. I had never seen or smelled anything like it. How does stuff burn while boiling!? I seemed to have nailed that. I was worried I'd never be able to get the stench out of the house. My kids were positive that would never be possible. Way to go with the encouragement, children o' mine.
See, I try. But boy can I fail.
Saturday, August 1, 2015
An Assessment
Thinking, thinking, thinking.
How to proceed. I've recognized importance of reestablishing effective self-care, acknowledged need for reassessment of mental wellness, and took action to help restore a sense of balance? I feel encouraged that my doctor observed and understood that much of what I'm experiencing right now is circumstantial. This, in turn, has brought out, seemingly, insurmountable stress to daily living.
Heading into July I made a request. I asked that we all make an effort to establish harmony in our day-to-day home life. Summer break from schools and reduced work hours due to slow season made it so the kids and I were constantly bickering. I had lost all patience. Our home environment had become tense; it seemed that everyone in the house was focused on making everything a point of contention. It really was becoming unbearable. Healthy rapport was thrown out the window.
I was bothered about anxiety symptoms rearing their heads. Escalating depression, well... that was distressing. Now that we made it through July, regardless of having abandoned all effort to be more considerate of each other, and I've done something to address the situations pertaining to my mental health, it is time to move forward.
How to do that? First, try not to nag or display uneasiness. I frequently remind housemates,"We are all adults here." I think I need to add, "Let's act like it." I need to remember to voice my concerns as clear and concisely as possible; not drone on and on. Another thing I should work on is eating and sleep habits, and of course continue to take my meds as prescribed. Yeah, that seems reasonable.
So, baby steps, one day at a time, slow and steady... ugh, I hate all that. Take care of me is more to my liking.
More tomorrow.
How to proceed. I've recognized importance of reestablishing effective self-care, acknowledged need for reassessment of mental wellness, and took action to help restore a sense of balance? I feel encouraged that my doctor observed and understood that much of what I'm experiencing right now is circumstantial. This, in turn, has brought out, seemingly, insurmountable stress to daily living.
Heading into July I made a request. I asked that we all make an effort to establish harmony in our day-to-day home life. Summer break from schools and reduced work hours due to slow season made it so the kids and I were constantly bickering. I had lost all patience. Our home environment had become tense; it seemed that everyone in the house was focused on making everything a point of contention. It really was becoming unbearable. Healthy rapport was thrown out the window.
I was bothered about anxiety symptoms rearing their heads. Escalating depression, well... that was distressing. Now that we made it through July, regardless of having abandoned all effort to be more considerate of each other, and I've done something to address the situations pertaining to my mental health, it is time to move forward.
How to do that? First, try not to nag or display uneasiness. I frequently remind housemates,"We are all adults here." I think I need to add, "Let's act like it." I need to remember to voice my concerns as clear and concisely as possible; not drone on and on. Another thing I should work on is eating and sleep habits, and of course continue to take my meds as prescribed. Yeah, that seems reasonable.
So, baby steps, one day at a time, slow and steady... ugh, I hate all that. Take care of me is more to my liking.
More tomorrow.
Friday, July 31, 2015
An Admission
Sure, I'll admit it. I've been avoiding (or, more like, shying away from) posting an update on The Sadness *Wellness* Watch 2015 Page because, reasons. Maybe it's just that I haven't been at my computer when my brain kicks into gear and comes up with what to write. Yeah, that's it. Anyway, link over for Day Two update.
When I have been at my computer, I was doing stuff like this:
When I have been at my computer, I was doing stuff like this:
Lillian Carilo
Somebody... make it stop. *sigh*
[on weeks long loop]
August 1: It's Too Hot song by @hankgreen
Watching a whole lotta @mental_floss on @YouTube; especially enjoying @ElliottcMorgan, @wheezywaiter & @johngreen HUGE faces on 50" tv
Simply put... #SUMMER2015!! Thank you, Italy. #ROCKIN1000 Musicians Play Foo Fighters: Learn To Fly at the Same Time http://nerdist.com/1000-musicians-play-foo-fighters-learn-to-fly-at-the-same-time/ …
~~~~~
Back tomorrow, Saturday, August 1, 2015 with: An AssessmentThursday, July 30, 2015
Sadness Watch 2015
Trust me, this is gonna have a good ending. Stick with me. I'm 50. I'm a daughter. I'm a sister. I'm a wife. I'm a mother. These things are good. Except when things are not-so-good.
My last What's Happening Twitter update was:
The Retweet before that was:
You may be wondering, "Who is John Green and what makes he and, probably, his friends so awesome?" Go here & here & here & here to link to John Green stuff.
Stuff that's been on my mind is how I'm not doing anything constructive or creative at the moment. Just kind of like on auto-pilot. So, I'm Swiffering the hardwood floor, feeling unusual degree of sadness, and I'm thinking, I should blog about this. It's not Mental Health Awareness season... at least I don't think so. It's just a time when I am finally able to deal with elevated... depression symptoms. See what happened there? I said trust me, right? #ebbandflow, baby.
Okay. Now, I'm swiffering the floor and thinking about this cool guy on the internet and then the husband interrupts my blogging and all these things come together in my brain... probably, with (because of?) new meds that doctor prescribed. Yeah, that's probably it... not. Anyway, I think, "I have to set up a Sadness *Wellness* Watch 2015 page." Yeah.
This is my intro to that page ( link here ). If you're 50 (or not); if you're a daughter (or son); if you have family, friends, pets, a job, hobbies & interests, it then makes sense to be able to appreciate all these things - because these things are good. Except when things are not-so-good... or more aptly, seem not-so-good. That's the time to say something; do something.
My last What's Happening Twitter update was:
- It's @Swiffer time.
The Retweet before that was:
- Happy So Glad You're You Day @johngreen! Oh, and Happy #FriendshipDay to you & your, probably, also awesome friends.
You may be wondering, "Who is John Green and what makes he and, probably, his friends so awesome?" Go here & here & here & here to link to John Green stuff.
Stuff that's been on my mind is how I'm not doing anything constructive or creative at the moment. Just kind of like on auto-pilot. So, I'm Swiffering the hardwood floor, feeling unusual degree of sadness, and I'm thinking, I should blog about this. It's not Mental Health Awareness season... at least I don't think so. It's just a time when I am finally able to deal with elevated... depression symptoms. See what happened there? I said trust me, right? #ebbandflow, baby.
~~~~~
This blog post interrupted for text messaging with out of town husband.
~~~~~
Okay. Now, I'm swiffering the floor and thinking about this cool guy on the internet and then the husband interrupts my blogging and all these things come together in my brain... probably, with (because of?) new meds that doctor prescribed. Yeah, that's probably it... not. Anyway, I think, "I have to set up a Sadness *Wellness* Watch 2015 page." Yeah.
This is my intro to that page ( link here ). If you're 50 (or not); if you're a daughter (or son); if you have family, friends, pets, a job, hobbies & interests, it then makes sense to be able to appreciate all these things - because these things are good. Except when things are not-so-good... or more aptly, seem not-so-good. That's the time to say something; do something.
Wednesday, July 22, 2015
Back To Blogging
Hello. Having a good summer, I hope. We, here in the So Cal desert, mostly do what we can to stay cool. My family does, anyway. Temps have fallen below 100 degrees the past week, but it's been humid and it even rained a few times. Conditions like this are never fun for Taxi Mom, me. Glitchy a/c that needs repair makes for miserable conditions.
Anyway, I'm working my way back into writing a daily post. Main reason for this is to post updates to my newly created GoFundMe page. I had to do it. There are things to do, places to go, and higher learning to be done. With nothing to lose, I set a goal of $36,625. It sounds like so much... it is SO much. Crunching the numbers last night made me dizzy; coming to terms that creating a GoFundMe profile was a must-do... well, that tied my stomach in knots. The idea of at least my oldest daughter not returning to college senior year nearly floors me every time I contemplate it.
So, my daily blogs will tell a story, paint a picture, offer suggestions, or simply break down goal amount and give dollar amount on specific needs. I'll post updates here and hope for the best.
Wednesday, July 1, 2015
Please Watch, Like, Subscribe, or Comment
I recently found the motivation to participate in a YouTube Production skills boot camp. It was all right.
I'm not gonna go as far as to say that my videos are new and improved, but I will say that my set design doesn't look too bad.
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| Ha, I never finish stuff. |
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